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Written by The Elder   

 
 

Somali Pirates

  Ok, I am seriously at a loss for words about this Somali pirate situation. First of all I thought pirates were just in movies and history books. Secondly, I thought Somalis only used rocks and maybe canoes. To find out that these ragamuffins are out on the high seas plundering boot, taking hostages and getting ransom completely blows my mind. I thought the United States of America would have smashed them beyond the memory of existence. How the hell can a bunch of nameless hucksters in johnny boats climb aboard super cargo ships and steal them? Oh yea, because the crew is not allowed to defend themselves. Sounds like getting in a fight in the American public school system.. Even if you get your ass kicked and didn't even fight back you also get suspended from school.

 
 

I Mean Really?

 What the fuck better life are they expected to get by stealing shit? Do you think this guy could pull off a John Phillips suit and a Rolex watch? I mean really? This guy is probably already dead if he is not he won't live much longer. These pirates are not the sharpest knife in the draw let alone the most reliable. By reliable I mean loyal. I'm sure 9 pirates die every time they split of the bounty. So I guess the United States policy against pirates is, let them steal long enough and they will kill each other in the process of splitting the goods. Makes great sense if you are not one of the crew aboard a vessel that gets hijacked.

 
 

 America's Balls Have Dropped Off

To be honest our politicians are fucking candy asses who get everything in life brought to them hand and foot. What the fuck would they know about hard times or dangerous neighborhoods? Nothing. They live in gated communities where other people protect their worthless asses. I mean seriously, who really trusts a politician? Probably less than 80% of people. I bet if you let normal Americans decide what to do about these pirates you would have a solution in about 5 minutes., Kill all the mother fucking pirates you worthless dung hole called Washington DC. We need to send the pirates to DC maybe there they could do some good. lulz

 



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